Rupturing your Achilles tendon can really give you an opportunity to reflect on your life. Questions such as “Will I ever walk again?” “Why does urgent care suck?” and “How long can I go without showering?” are all valid in situations such as these.

Snapping that twitchy, vital little tendon in two also gave me a great excuse to put off Bearhugs-posting (and almost everything else in my life) for two weeks, causing my compatriots at QCLA to scramble for notable discussions points such as the Kitten Cannon and ninjas.

Fortunately for the masses, I have a few things – musings on pop culture, music and the like – about which I’m itching to wax snark-y…and we can’t forget my “Best of 06” list that I may eventually finish by the time I need to compile my list for 07.

Has anyone seen Fox’s 1/2 Hour News Hour yet? I know that a brief clip was released last week and I’m pretty sure that the first episode aired on Sunday (Feb 18). I also know that the bald, white heads at Fox ain’t entirely convinced that a right-wing response to The Daily Show and Colbert Report is a sure bet as they’ve only ordered two episodes thus far.

Quite a few people blogged nasty in response to the clip, including my favorite at The Onion, The Hater. Check it out here.

I don’t claim to be an expert on humor, except to say that I know what makes me laugh, but so far as I can tell, there are approximately two jokes contained within and they both revolve around narcotics and farts. Definitely low-brow. You know what would be hilarious? A skit where Rush Limbaugh has been elected Commander-In-Chief and Ann Coulter is Vice President. Oh…and then follow it up with a Hillary Clinton / lesbian gag!

Oh…SNAP!

Seriously…that’s what you’re bringing to the table? A stiff, ham-fisted, mean-spirited string of poorly-written jokes barely worthy of the rejection bin at SNL’s Weekend Update? While the Daily Show and the Colbert Report seem intent on presenting the absurdity of media, politics and pop culture with a crooked smile and a subtle wink, the 1/2 Hour News Hour is apparently hoping to reach the same demographic that doubles over laughing from a crotch shot captured on home video. Preferably crotches owned by Democrats.

I know there are plenty of witty, creative, intelligent conservatives out there…but it’s obvious that none of them write for this program. If they did then perhaps the 1/2 News Hour’s wooden anchors would be better equipped to invoke Jon Stewart’s impeccable comedic timing and self-depreciating sensibility. Sure, the Daily show might be a tad left-skewed but I’ve never thought of it as a out-and-out rant against the right.

Politics aside, it’s just not funny…and 1.5 million Americans disagree with me.

The List: Part 2…

Disclaimer: I work with The Ackleys.  Including them on my Best of 2006 list might be unethical, but what the shit…I work with bands that I love.  Sue me.

The Ackleys - Forget Forget, Derive Derive - (House of Love)

 

As I mentioned above, I have an unnatural love affair with this Birmingham, AL band… and it scares me a little. Katie Crutchfield’s voice sweetly burrows its way into your subconscious with lyrics that are incredibly perceptive and worldly without sacrificing any of their intimacy and warmth.  As a band, the Ackleys boomerang around insanely catchy, kinetic indie rock songs like seasoned pros while the innocence of their age keeps the mood light and fun.

Check out an mp3 for the song “We’re Not Listening.”

Beating A Dead Horse…

People compile “best of” lists for one of three reasons:

1.  To validate your musical tastes: not only to yourself but in direct relation with the rest of the hipster community.

2.  To lord your perceived awesomeness over those decidedly less hip (which is essentially an extension of reason number 0ne).

3.  Because someone asked you to…and it would be rude to deny such a request, especially considering that this is your one chance to one-up that person on the hipness scale.

For me it’s all three.  Plus, I should multiply the pathetic factor it by ten since I’m actually re-posting my list that originally appeared on Sound As Language.  Is that wrong?

In all seriousness, I’m proud of what I’ve been spinning in my stereo this year.  Not only do these mostly DIY bands write amazing, creative songs, I would consider a few of them good friends…and it feels pretty good to be supporting your pals.

Over the next week or so I’ll be counting down my top ten records of 2006, in no particular order, mind you.  If you simply can’t wait, go here and prepare to have your doors blown the fuck off.  And while you’re at it, give Sound As Language a good once over. It’s run by my friend Will Miller and he does a terrific job.  He updates it almost every day and there’s no one who listens to more music — and whose opinion I respect more — than Will.

So let’s kick it off with Tiny Hawks “People Without End.” 

 

By the way, I kinda lied before because if I had to choose a number one, this would probably be it.  Aggressive, chaotic DC-influenced post-whatever-core isn’t supposed to make you happy, is it?  I should be smashing stuff and blaming my parents or the government for some injustice. Still, something about this Providence, RI duo’s propulsive, frenetic songwriting makes my heart feel like it’s trying to float its way through my chest almost every time.  I don’t know the first thing about playing an instrument or how to make it ring out with just the right intonation or alacrity, but contained within Tiny Hawks’ songs are layers upon layers of joyous chords zigzagging, cresting and crashing around excited rhythms while passionate voices sing songs of hope and reflection.

I couldn’t find an mp3 for this new record but here’s a song titled “Whenzy” from their first relase — which is just as good – that you can check out here.  Do yourself a favor and pick up both discs from Corleone Records.

Not only is he a good cartographer, he’s also good at making maps…

Check out Brad Walker’s terrific – and charmingly peculiar – zine / art project Majuscule.  Sure, anyone can flex their virtuosity online…but to do it in a unique, retrospective way that challenges and intrigues an artless schlub (like me) requires actual talent.

If I had to choose, I’d say that Issue 8 tugs on the ol’ heartstrings just a tad more earnestly, if only for the fact that it’s vintage Brad Walker, and vintage Brad Walker is a strange, charming place to visit.

Today…a blog was born.

And no one really cared.